Roger Ratinon (CJ)

• Relationship, Marriage And Couples Support
• Relationship Repair
• Resolving Misunderstanding And Conflict In
Relationships
• Creating Good Boundaries
• Infidelity And Restoring Trust
• Getting Over A Break-Up
• Gender Intelligence
• Relationships Gender Intelligence
• Workplace Gender Intelligence
• Personal And Relationships Emotional Intelligence
• Workplace Emotional Intelligence
• Career And Leadership
• Addictions Recovery
• Inner Child Discovery And Healing
• Overcoming Fears And Phobias
• Sleep Paralysis
• Grief, Loss And Bereavement
• Resolving Stress And Anxiety
• Anger Management
• Health And Well-Being
• Personal Development
• Lifestyle
• Life Purpose
• Journaling
• Changing Limiting Beliefs Into Empowering Beliefs
• Self - Love And Self - Partnering
• Confidence Development
• Understanding And Overcoming Narcissism
• Understanding And Overcoming Co-Dependency
• Life Stage Transitions
• Mid-Life Crisis
• Support In Our Relationships And The Spiritual
Angles Of Understanding
• Spirituality, Faith & Religion
• Learn A Mind Control Technique
• Mindfulness
• Meditation

The Process
With over 30 years of experience, I have been involved in roles supporting individuals, couples, and families.

See Client And Seminar Testimonials
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1lT64vE6kMoOU08_fbZvH2emtdZEE298w16io94DibQM/edit#

I will provide a confidential, safe space for you to share and discover your innermost thoughts and feelings.
We will look at the problems and issues you wish to look at and your overall outcomes, what you want to achieve, and in each session.

You will see how your problems and issues are looked at in the other modalities in this Services section.
IMPORTANT - Please note: All these Services are just tools and optional approaches to the way you would like to look at your problems and issues and how to resolve them.

The process involves attentive listening and self-reflection.
In addition, agreed on work that you will do for yourself and bring to the next session.

To enable you to move FAST TRACK to
Baseline good human character, qualities, behaviour, and functioning requires you to operate in these areas below correctly. This really does cover so many bases in terms of the issues you are experiencing.

And to do that,
These are the recommended stages we will look at;

1. Journaling: I will explain to you how you do this exercise and give you a guidance sheet with examples of how journaling is best done.

This is very likely going to help you to REDUCE the number of coaching sessions you would have.

Your journaling can take a couple of days or one or two weeks in your own time.
You will then be invited to bring your diary or document to the next session and choose from what you have journaled, and what to talk about if you wish, though it is not essential or necessary to discuss them at all if you do not wish to.
You can keep what you have journaled privately for yourself only.

2. Limiting Beliefs: The journaling work exercise though clears the ground before we look at any limiting beliefs you might have and move to adopt empowering beliefs.

3. Neuroplasticity: Next the process of rewiring your brain or otherwise known as neuroplasticity will take place because you will be focused on not entering into your limiting beliefs and instead adopting empowering beliefs.

4. Learn A Mind Control Technique
You will be able to do this with a mind-control technique that is not known in the world. It is an original mind-control tool I will share with you. And it is easy to grasp and works very fast.

5. Boundaries: We will then look at any boundaries issues you might have and how you will be able to better support them.

6. Emotional Intelligence: How to have better emotional intelligence.

7. Gender Intelligence – the differences between men and women. Knowing this will support you in so many ways in your relationships and communication with the opposite sex. And you will also learn a lot about yourself and your gender differences.

8. Finally you see in this Services section, the other coaching services or modalities that I work with.

Changing the recording, editing your original film script, your past memories.

You cannot factually change your past, however, you can trick your body into believing that you now have better memories or resolve the situation/s that originally occurred in your past.

SAFETY - That is actually all the body is interested in as a biological machine, NOT your original past.

Unprocessed emotions are hostile in your body. What you are doing is creating a less hostile environment at the cellular level when you process your emotions.

Limiting beliefs are the major culprits stopping us from achieving our goals and living our values.

● They act as rules that stop us from getting what is possible, what we are capable of and what we deserve.

● When a coach asks “what stops you from achieving your goal?”, the answer very often is limiting beliefs.

● Limiting beliefs may come from childhood, past experiences, or even from the media - I am not good enough or I am bad with computers.

Neuroplasticity is really the application of the well-known and familiar, NLP - Neurolinguistic Programming or CBT - Cognitive Behaviour Therapy.

It is also known as brain plasticity, which is the ability of neural networks in the brain to change through growth and reorganization.

These changes range from individual neuron pathways making new connections, to systematic adjustments like cortical remapping.

The Bottom Line The nervous system controls our body via communication through neural pathways.
Based on our goals, desires, and habits, the brain tries to modify these pathways.

For example, pathways involved in memory can be improved and extended via multiple repetitions.

On a daily basis, we train our brain to create a new pathway.
We repeat an action over and over again until it is defined in the brain as a new pathway.
This pathway then becomes part of our brain.

According to research, it takes twenty-one days to make or break a habit. This habit formation is dependent on training our brain to create new neural pathways.

Complex behaviours like driving a car are an example of new neural pathways formed.

I enable the client to help him or her make new pathways in the brain so they can support their thoughts, feelings and behaviour in more predictable and satisfying ways.

How to stop all that head talk and annoying and often debilitating voices within?

Besides love and financial security, this is probably people’s biggest desire in the world.

And does it really work?

Many people have spent a lot of time, money, and energy on retreats, reading and researching books, and various practices, yet afterward still find that their minds do not give them the peace and control they hoped for.

I will share with you an original mind-control technique that I created and it is so simple, you will be blown over with a feather. Its effectiveness though is to keep using this technique.

• Boundaries are guidelines for how you relate to the self and to the rest of the world.

• It defines your individuality. The ‘Me’

• How do you want to be treated by others?

• How you treat yourself.

• It reflects are integrity and values, and beliefs, past experiences, likes and dislikes.

• Everything inside is what gives you freedom, the unique expression of who you are as an individual in this world.
Your joy, your happiness, what makes you unique.

• You are responsible and in charge of your feelings, thoughts and behaviours and how you want to interact in the world.

• You will learn about what boundaries and how to create and protect them?

• What are the consequences if we don’t have boundaries?

• Good belief systems and how to value oneself.

• What are the changes we experience when we have boundaries and good belief systems?

Men and women certainly experience emotions and can say they feel, sad, happy, angry, guilty, envious, etc.

However, 99% of men and women do not understand the purpose and message of emotions.

They can be interpreted, experienced, and played out as low emotional intelligence or high emotional intelligence.

Both the low and the high emotional intelligence have meaning and a message.

In other words, you'll learn how to respond to your emotions to change your communication and behaviour for the better.

Example: The emotion of anger is about supporting your boundaries or neglect of your boundaries.

• The brain differences between men and women are practically unheard of by the majority of therapists in relationship counseling. Consequently, clients attend far more sessions than they need to.

Here are some communication differences;

• Boys naturally use movement to think.
• Females hear better than males.
• Males will automatically block out certain sounds.
• Females can verbally express their emotions better
than males.
• Women also exhibit a stronger emotional response to
the anticipation of pain.
• Males are More Likely to Overestimate Their Ability.
• Men are more likely to perceive a neutral face as
unfriendly.
• Women use both sides of the brain to respond to
emotional experiences while men use just one.
• Women read subtle emotions better than men.
• Men Thrive in Conflict, Women Avoid it.
• Males are aroused under stress while females are
turned off.

There are neurological and hormonal brain differences that can be presented and explained in more detail and these are just a few of over 100 differences.

The amount of misunderstanding and conflict that takes place in relationships both in our personal and workplace lives and all because both sexes believe they should see and feel the same way as each other.
And this is so not the case.

Of course, this impacts too on the psychological and emotional differences men and women present.

• I enable you to avoid being so daunted by looking within and an easier awareness experience and ability.

• As a child, most of us were afraid of the dark. We didn’t like it that we couldn’t see. And we often carry that same feeling now were older.

• So going within our inner being has never been that inviting or easy to work out what to do inside ourselves because it’s more often dark.

• We are fearful of what we are going to see and what we are going to find. We cannot see in that darkness obviously.

• We wonder why we are so easily triggered and startled by ourselves.

• Our inner selves become like a minefield. We don’t know how to navigate in this space, there is no map. Many of us find it strange or unnerving to be asked to get in touch with ourselves. We find it an intangible experience.

• When we avoid or reject our inner self, we focus all our experience on having to come from outside ourselves.

• Outside ourselves is more important than inside ourselves. It is more tangible and feels real. It feels safer and less fearful.

• But the outer experience has to then make up and compensate for everything. It has to hide our fearful and empty feelings on the inside. Therefore we become fragile and easily triggered. We become uneasy.

• Young or older, why we avoid going with within is we can get triggered by something we didn’t expect to see or feel.

• Or we know what we feel when triggered but we don’t know where the bombs are, we don’t know how to stop them from going off. We become scared of our own shadow.

• We easily lose control of what we are going to say, feel or do. We don’t know how to respond to others and situations when the bomb goes off.

• We live an existence of feeling like we’re a ticking time bomb.

• I support you to understand why it is dark within.

• Darkness facilitates you not to know everything all at once.

• Past, present, and future are always with us but to see it all at once would not be a very pleasant living experience.

Self-love can be felt and experienced as really weird because you may never have felt this is what you should do or that you deserve it.

The person we may find it hardest to be kind and sympathetic to is, surprisingly, ourselves.

Yet being a friend to ourselves provides the only viable basis for living an emotionally fulfilled life.

But isn’t this narcissistic to do this?

No, it’s not!

Self-love is about gratitude and doing activities that support you to make you feel healthily fulfilled in life. It is also about emotionally processing, emotional maturity.

Self Success is what men resonate with better, it's how men are neurologically and hormonally wired that makes them respond differently to women who will prefer to work with self love, if they are in that supported space.

You want to overcome intoxicant abuse such as cigarettes and alcohol, marijuana, cocaine, and even coffee. It may be a sex addiction and or pornography.

Whatever addiction, I will help you to identify what has caused the addiction and dependency and how it has impacted your life, friends, family, and social network.

You will learn and apply prevention-related training methods which include how to break the addiction, trigger impulse urges and cravings, communication skills, motivation/self-control, critical thinking/problem-solving techniques and change how you operate with friends, family, and social settings for recovery from addiction.

Healing really is a holistic process. One will not be able to support the mind and feelings alone without giving some consideration to for example; your diet.

After all, they say we are what we eat.

We might take better care of our car, than our own body's and the fuel we put in is an important consideration to keep it going.

You can also learn about how diseases are related to the emotions we dwell on.

The child within is quite a well-untilised concept within the counseling therapeutic community.

Who is this child within?

And why is the concept of the younger child referred to in counseling?

It involves going back in time and into the past. But what if some of those memories are not such happy memories?

What if you were perhaps misunderstood, hurt or devalued in some way by e.g. your parent/s or a brother or sister, another child at school?

That child within?

Basically, he or she is the younger you.
And the way you were treated at that time, misunderstood, put down not heard, these are still unpleasant memories, they are still wounds that remain unhealed.

What is Narcissism?

Narcissism is an unhealthy focus on the self that affects others in unhealthy ways.

Most people 'want the good stuff' and from a psychological point of view: everything we do is for some emotional 'payoff' - in order to feel better about ourselves and life.

99% of all in this world have narcissistic traits to varying degrees, however an actual narcissist is one who doesn't want to look at healing themselves and is in denial about their behaviour and insecurities.

One who is seeking help /therapy and applying methods to heal in a very real way is only a person who has narcissistic traits, more often created by faulty programming/parenting/role models in childhood, though is not a narcissist.

This healing work involves releasing emotional trauma, a combination of the other services mentioned.

Co-Dependency - Please Help Me Be Safe Rather than take responsibility for their own lives.

Co-dependents try to control events and people through granting compassion, advice-giving, lecturing, helplessness, emotional blackmail, manipulation, guilt, or anger.

Co-dependents feel empty on the inside and try to fill this emptiness with 'things' outside of themselves. They are personally dis-empowered in this state.

Sleep paralysis is a feeling of being unable to move, either at the onset of sleep or upon awakening.

The individual’s senses and awareness are intact, but they may feel as if there is pressure on them, or as if they are choking.

It may be accompanied by hallucinations and intense fear.

Sleep paralysis is not life-threatening, but it can cause anxiety.

These occur during the transition between sleeping and waking, and they consistently fall into one of three categories:

• Intruder: There are sounds of doorknobs opening, shuffling footsteps, a shadow man, or a sense of a threatening presence in the room.

• Incubus: Feelings of pressure on the chest, difficulty breathing with the sense of being smothered, strangled, or sexually assaulted by a malevolent being. The individual believes they are about to die.

• Vestibular-motor: A sense of spinning, falling, floating, flying, hovering over one’s body or another type of out-of-body experience.

I have an in-depth knowledge of what are the causes of sleep paralysis and how to shift you out of this experience and symptoms of depression.

Please note: I do not present faith and spiritual discourse in the support I give to those who are not looking for it).

For those that are faith inclined, the majority of people have the best intentions in becoming spiritual and or aligning to their faith.

They are able to appreciate the virtues and values expounded in the sermons, though it can feel really debilitating when in their marriages and relationships, they find they are not getting on with each other and hurting each other often in small and big ways.

It’s very hard for faith practicing couples or one in the couple to come out and admit what they learn and believe should work.

This is because they are getting spiritual guidance and so why isn't it working?

And they see that when they try to implement it, that it’s not working as they expected.

And there is perhaps too, one in the relationship more aligned to the faith than the other, and that creates upset and conflict also.

I support couples in all of the above-listed services mentioned coupled with spiritual angles of understanding, their problems, and issues.

Really practical solutions for how to integrate the often lofty statements and spiritual philosophy with what that means for couples in their everyday lives.

There was also an original design blueprint for both males and females, femininity and masculinity.

It's seeing this design element behind the roles that men and women traditionally played and how or can it really fit into the 21st-century view of ourselves today?

It's not really possible for the majority to import the complete ancient traditional package into their lives today.

Though some of it can be implemented and it's up to each individual, couple, or family to decide how they wish to live spiritually. That I can advise on.

It is worth knowing that the differences in neurology and hormonal disposition of men and women had spiritual purposes.

Please note: I do not present faith and spiritual discourse in the support I give to those who are not looking for it).

Many people are very specific about what they are looking for and spirituality, faith and religion are related, yet different.

People have very different ideas about what spirituality, faith and religion mean to them. I am able to support you in your understanding and the guidance you seek.

• Some people are looking for the meaning of life.

• Some ask, why do bad things happen to good people?

• How can you say there is a loving God when so many unfair and bad things happen in the world?

• Suffering bereavement and why did God take my loved one away?

• Where do we go after we die?

• Why does there have to be a male God only? Perhaps there is the divine female too.

• Why do religions appear to cause war?

• My partner is a Christian and I am a Hindu, we need help to support each other’s faith.

• And unfortunately, there are some that have had bad experiences in faith and spiritual groups and communities and are looking for answers and healing.

My specific faith is Vaisnavaism or what Hare Krishna’s practices. It is related to Hinduism.
In addition, my faith background growing up was Christian, Catholic.

I was a monk and manager for 18 years in a Hare Krishna temple.
I have considerable experience in philosophy, practice, and the questions and issues above mentioned.
I continue my practice today so that will be 23 years in total.

I do have good knowledge to support people in the majority of faiths and spirituality because there are a lot of crossovers.

Other considerations.

What type of discourse are you looking for in looking at your problem or issue?

Are you a Seeker or an Existing Practitioner?

Would you describe yourself as traditional or conservative in respect of your faith?
Or more Liberal?

Perhaps you value both conservative and liberal ways of being and the discourse.

The majority of relationship difficulties originate from a lack of awareness of the differences between male and female natures.

The greatest institution in life is marriage, yet how much time do we dedicate to learning the art of relationships?

Understanding Men, Understanding Women takes a look at the differences between men and women, examining the social roles they play, dissecting their psychological and neurological makeup, exploring their hormonal profile, the meaning and messages of emotions and ultimately discovering how all of these factors impact on relationships.

Combining both cutting-edge research with timeless wisdom from the ancient Vedas, these seminars will teach the science of how to develop deep, meaningful and lasting relationships.

These seminars can be customised in length from 2 - 6 hours.

Seminar Testimonials https://docs.google.com/document/d/1lT64vE6kMoOU08_fbZvH2emtdZEE298w16io94DibQM/edit#

Perhaps you are deciding what career path to take or trying to work out whether you are a good fit for the role you are in currently or it’s about switching careers or taking a sabbatical or maternity leave.

It may be that you are struggling in your role or have issues with the boss or a colleague, in which case you will see how my other services will relate to resolving the problems and issues.

I will advise you to decide what are you trying to achieve?
I will support you in coming up with all the career options. You will also be introduced to various coaching tools that facilitate this process.

And if required to look at your leadership, executive skills, and capacity.