Can you help? Couple post request for ‘sexpert’ to watch and critique their sex tape

To help our customers find the professionals they need, we share some of the more alternative requests we get through – with their consent of course. This time, a couple is looking for a ‘sexpert’ to analyse their sex tape, in a bid to improve their relationship and save their marriage.

This isn’t a job our counsellors normally procure through the site or a service we facilitate, however we’re hoping that either one of our experts will be able to help or an expert will see this and get in touch with them. The couple have asked to remain anonymous but are happy to make their Bark public in order to help them find the right person for the job.

Here’s their request in full:

My husband and I have been married for twelve years and have two children together, aged 7 and 3. We have always seen sex as a huge part of our relationship and used to make time to ‘get intimate’ a couple of times a week at least. However, despite devoting time and energy to it neither of us have found making love pleasurable for the last few years. I hate to sound cliché but it feels like the spark has gone out. Luckily, my husband and I are very open and honest with each other, and we both feel the same.

After the birth of our second daughter three years ago, I stopped feeling sexy or desirable and although I remember this happening after giving birth to my first, I soon felt like myself after a couple of weeks. This time round I don’t feel like I’ve ever gotten back to that. My husband regularly compliments me, but this doesn’t help me get in the mood and I think it’s contributed to us viewing sex as a chore.

We still have sex a few times a month, but it’s rare that either of us will be fully satisfied by the act. We keep trying to make it work as we still find each other sexually attractive and love each other, but the lack of sexual enjoyment is starting to put a strain on other areas of our relationship.

We need help soon otherwise we are scared this might be the end for us, which is why we are looking for a professional sexpert (if that’s such a thing) or counsellor to help us see where we are going wrong and give us some pointers so we can rekindle our once amazing sex life and marriage.

We would like the professional to sit down with us first, so we can get to know each other and discuss our needs and we’re open to how many sessions the expert thinks we’ll need. One thing that we’re adamant on is we’d like them to watch a video of us having sex and analyse what they think we are doing wrong, which would then be fed back to us in a sort of debrief session. I know this is unconventional, but after discussions with my husband, we’ve both agreed that for someone to really help us, they need to see how we interact with each other.

Any candidate must have at least 10 years’ experience in the sex/relationship field and MUST sign an NDA to keep our video, identities and all subjects discussed private. We don’t want the tape to go anywhere and it’s crucial we find someone who we can 100% trust.

We really believe this is make or break and have set aside around £1,000 to work with an expert and are open to negotiations depending on the candidate.

We are looking for some help ASAP, but we will discuss all finer details in person.

Do you think you can help the couple out? If you answered yes, then register your services here to apply for the job: 

Kai Feller, co-founder of said:

“With counselling being one of our most popular categories onsite we are used to requests from couples looking for a professional to help with their marriage, however we haven’t seen one quite like this before.

“’Sexpert’ is not a profession we currently have onsite as a standard service, but hopefully one of our relationship experts or counsellors will be able to help this couple out. Alternatively, any suitably qualified ‘Sexperts’ can sign up onsite to offer their services too.”

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