Lighting the way to Change
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Hi and welcome to Lighting the way to Change, my name is Tina Berry a counsellor based in the seaside town of Burnham on Sea in Somerset. I am currently working from my private practice where I offer short and long term therapy which is delivered via telephone and online , My main areas of support include addressing difficult relationships , anxiety , depression and grief and loss .
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What do you love most about your job?
The feeling I get from being able to help my clients to gain some clarity regarding their current problems is second to none. I regard it as a privilege as an observer to the changes clients make over time. Their patience in understanding what motivated them to reach out for help in the first instance and a commitment to self-care throughout their counselling
What inspired you to start your own business?
It's been a goal of mine for many years to be able to help others in need of support with their emotional wellbeing. I wanted to start my own business so that I could deliver a tailored and unique approach to counselling . It gave me flexibility in the hours I could offer and so not tied to certain hours that might be asked by organizations. As I work online predominately this gives me the opportunity to support my clients throughout the UK and not just locally
Why should our clients choose you?
My aim is to provide a safe and secure environment within to support my clients. I regard myself as a warm, empathic and caring counsellor and my aim is to help my clients to address whatever is standing in their way of a productive way of life. Sometimes we need a helping hand to get back on track and I believe accessing therapy can be the way forward.
Can you provide your services online or remotely? If so, please add details.
I am currently supporting my clients online via zoom sessions and via telephone. This enables me to support clients beyond my location and to those that cannot visit me in person for various reasons
What changes have you made to keep your customers safe from Covid-19?
As I work online and telephone this is not a factor in keeping clients safe
Co-dependency in relationships
Co-dependency is a pattern of behaviour that results in dysfunctional one-sided relationships. This is often seen as enabling another person to continue with their dysfunctional or addictive behaviour.
The traits associated with co-dependency are often low self-esteem, people-pleasing, poor boundaries, reactivity, caretaking, control, poor communication, denial, problems with intimacy and poor decision making. Often putting the needs of others first can have a detrimental effect on a person’s life resulting in poor health, depression, low self-esteem, loss of friendships and family members, or maybe feeling inadequate at work. If not mindful these traits can unknowingly be passed onto children. I have experience supporting clients that present with these symptoms and can help them to see that there is another way of living their lives for the better.
Depression
Depression is regarded as a mood disorder which involves persistent feelings of sadness and loss of interest. It is different from the mood fluctuations that people regularly experience as a part of life. Major life events, such as bereavement or the loss of a job, the breakdown of a relationship or a long-term health condition. Depression is an ongoing problem, not a passing one, it doesn’t just go away overnight.
Quite often the time during which the symptoms last are usually for more than two weeks. A person with depression can experience symptoms that last for several weeks, months, or years. Sharing how you feel can be difficult for a person especially if you have experienced depression for a long time. Taking one small step at a time can help a person suffering with depression and counselling can help to disentangle the many components that make up the dark place they find themselves in.
Grief and loss
Grief is the natural response to a loss and this can come in many forms such as the loss of a loved one, a relationship, a job, a way of life anything that you have formed an attachment or identity to. Its an individual experience for everyone and often one that there is no timescale. There is no right or wrong way to deal with a loss and we process it in our own way. The grieving process is often very difficult.
It's not just about coping with the loss but coping with change and that takes time. You can be left feeling a whole host of emotions and maybe a belief you will never get over it. Sometimes we just need someone to listen to our story, to understand how we are processing our feelings and thoughts. A helping hand to pull us out of the dark place we find ourselves in. Friends and family are important to us but it can feel like you don’t want to talk to them for fear of upsetting them or feeling like a burden. Counselling provides a safe and confidential place to explore the experience of grief and loss and can often in time help in coming to terms with it.
Anxiety
Feeling anxious is a fairly common state and one that most of us feel from time to time. For example, sitting an exam, going for an interview or maybe going on that first date. A certain amount of anxiety is good for us, it’s what motivates us to reach our goals, keep us safe and to feel energised.
But for some people anxiety levels can spiral out of control, leaving the person feeling overly worried. This can stop a person from engaging in life in the way they want to. Some people can find keeping a job or going out to crowed places difficult to do. Symptoms can vary but quite often people report feeling irritable, restless, a sense of dread (that something awful will happen), difficulty concentrating, feeling that life will never improve for them. Together with the client we can explore these feelings and understand the reason for their anxiety. If open to them, I can also suggest techniques to help the client overcome anxiety which can help them in the future.
